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I'm thinking about how my life should have been.

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by Danieleso
1 year ago
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1
3
840
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Fort George G. Meade, Maryland, a cloudy morning.
A young woman steps inside the lobby. She stops in front of a security agent:
- “I would like to see the director.”
- “I beg your pardon?”
- “I need to see the director, can you tell me where his office is?”
- “Do you have an appointment?”
- “No. Why? Should I have an appointment?”
The man grabs her arm:
- “You should leave Miss!”
- “No! Let go! Help!” She yells.
A black suited man approaches:
- “What’s going on here?”
- “She asks for the director, but she has no accreditation nor appointment” answers the guard
The man in the suit turns to the girl:
- “I’m agent Hawking. What’s your name and why do you want to see the director?”
- “I’m Cynthia Robinson, I need the NSA to spy on my boyfriend Josh.”
- “What?!”
- “That’s what you do right!? Spying on people, reading their conversions, following them everywhere… I want you to discover if Josh is planning on banging that Jennifer bitch”
- “Miss, it’s not our job to deal with relationship troubles”

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by Sammy
1 year ago
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1708
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Damn job! It’s a big client my boss said, you can’t make him wait, it’s only for two days, do it or you’re fired he said! Bullshit! 1000 miles, a snow storm and I’m stuck in a motel room, in Minnesota! No cable, no internet, no book, nothing to do apart from dying of boredom! I can’t believe I’m going to spend Christmas night here! I should've join the Marines! I should quit, I can’t do this anymore! Ok! I'm gonna call my boss right now and tell him to go fuck himself! Where's my phone? ...
Knock knock!
Did someone just knock!? What kind of fool is outside in this weather?
I open the door. Two men in black stand in front of me.
- “Mr. James North?” Ask the man on the left.
- “Yes” I respond.
- “Agent Kuller and Agent Johnson, NSA. Follow us please.”

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by Ninja
1 year ago
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1230
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I open my eyes. Where the hell am I? What is this place? I suddenly realize that I’m tied up to a pipe. What happened to me?! I look around: I’m in big room, some broken pieces of furniture are laying on the ground, everything is covered with dust.

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by Pajamas
1 year ago
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1734
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To make that delicious cocktail, all you need is:
- 2 onces of Vodka.
- 0.5 onces of Lemon Juice.

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by LittleFlower
1 year ago
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865
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- Ok, here's the vault! Let's open that bitch!
- Just a sec Harry, let me grab my tools!
- Damn Marvin, what the fuck is this?
- It's a blowtorch!
- Do you even know how to use this thing?
- Dude, I've seen all the Ocean's movies!
- Come on Marvin, they don't even use a blowtorch in these movies!
- Trust me Harry, I know what I'm doing!
(3 minutes later...)
- Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!!
- I'm so sorry Harry!
- I'M GONNA KILL YA MARVIN!!!

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by SeqwelsTeam
1 year ago
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1406